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An explanation as to why we
included the lame with the bad. First, we are lazy and didn't want to take the time
to build a separate web page for both. Second, we are cheap and didn't want to use
up precious bandwidth or waste any more kilobytes on such drivel. Third, we didn't
think you would waste your time reading them all anyway. In all fairness, the lame
lines are not really bad, just too trite or overused and some of these are older than
dirt. The bad lines are self-explanatory but the list is hardly comprehensive.
In fact, we estimate that the complete world collection of bad pick-up lines is the
only number in existence that may be actually larger than the amount of money owned by
Bill Gates; besides, there is not enough computer bytes available worldwide to hold them
all anyway. Since this is a PG site, we could not list the really bad ones anyway
because all of those are sexual innuendoes that usually relate to male and female body
parts or the joining of the two in some obscene way. You know, the stuff guaranteed
to get the guy laid if he just says the right line. (Girl chorus in background:
hahahahahah). Well here are a few for your enjoyment:
Not Bad - Just a little Lame What's your sign? (voted most often heard) Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot. Hi. I'm Big Brother. I've been watching you..." "Where have you been all my life Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on! I'm sorry I'm an artist and it's my job to stare at beautiful women. Nice to meet you, I'm (your name) and you are...gorgeous! (do not use on truly gorgeous women) Help the homeless. Take me home with you. (cute but sounds needy) Here's a quarter....call your roommate and tell her you won't be coming home tonight. (a bit presumptuous) You look just like my mother. (this belongs in the bad category) Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married? Do you have a name or can I call you mine? (ugh) Bond. James Bond. (used a zillion times since the first Bond movie) If beauty were sunlight, you'd shine from a million light-years away. (too soapy) I only have 3 months to live... (oh that's attractive) Where have you been all my life? (one of those older than dirt) I'm Irish. Do you have any Irish in you? (No.) Would you like some?
(sigh) I hope you know CPR because you take my breath away. Do you think God would be angry if I married one of his angels? Have I died and gone to heaven? You look like an angel. Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!I didn't think angels exist, but I'm talking to one now. Oh my sweet darling! For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me. (ace ack ack) You are under arrest for robbery. You stole my heart. (almost
kinda cute) You must be a parking ticket cuz you got FINE written all over you. (might work way downtown) Are you hot? Well, you sure are making me sweat! Do you have any raisins? How about a date? (this belongs in the dumb joke category) I'll give you a dollar if you give me your name and phone number. (too cheap) I know milk does a body good but damn, how much have you been drinking? Are you Greek? (No.) Oh my bad. I thought all goddesses were Greek.
(how do you live up to that) Excuse me, I don't want you to think I'm ridiculous or anything, but you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to tell you. (she will probably just think you are ridiculous) Where have you been all my life? (older than time-probably
uttered by the first caveman) There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you. Was you father an alien? Because there's nothing else like you on earth!" Who's a nice girl doing in a place like this?" (popular movie phrase from the old days) Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me? (maybe we have this in the wrong category?) Didn't I see you on the cover of Vogue? (only works if true - over flattering usually backfires)
These fall on their own lack of merit - no further editorial comment necessary
Uh, hey baby. Uh, do you like come here often? You need a man in your life, baby. And like, I need a woman. Let's like get into each other's life or whatever. Uh, like let's drop all the uh B.S. and like, you know, do it. Uh, get into my car and into my dreams, baby. What's your sign? Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me! What would you do if I kissed you right now? If I said you were sexy, would you hold it against me?. I can make you feel like youve never had sex before.. My lips are registered weapons. If you need a love doctor, I applied to medical school If you ever had sex with a machine, that's what it's like with me. If you're really hot, I bet I can cool you down.. Hey, are you one of those chicks who goes out with guys right off the bat? 'Cause that's what I'm looking for.. Should I call you for breakfast or will you like cook it for me?. You may not be really hot, but I bet you like to do it.. Hey, I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you. I think I've had a little too much to drink tonight because you're starting to look pretty good. So...when are we gonna get together? Will you marry me and have my children.
and two of our all-time favorites Yo Baby! Let's Do It! Hey Baby! You got nice (insert your choice of female anatomy here)
ENOUGH...ENOUGH... show me some good lines nah just get me outta here
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