Capturing a Doe

Capturing a Doe Elmer Fudd9.0L.JPG (3822 bytes)
(for those of you who are hunting impaired-a Doe is a female deer)
ROMANCE CENTRAL

Endearing the DOE -
Deer (Dear) Hunting in the Forest of Love

If men were bucks and women were does, the entire process of getting together would be so much simpler than the highly confusing process of human courtship. If humans behaved like deer, then romance and complex courtship rituals would be irrelevant, mating would occur only sporadically and most bucks would not get a girl at all. To be successful in love as a buck, all you would have to do is be the biggest and strongest deer in the forest. The does would all flock to you while the rest of the vanquished bucks would be left to spend their winters alone with nothing to do expect eat their wheaties and hope for better luck next year.

Fortunately you are not a deer, which is probably a good thing since at least you don't have to worry about someone hanging your head as a trophy on their wall. However, even if you are the biggest, strongest human buck in your neck of the forest, that hardly guarantees that you will end up with a harem of does awaiting your beck and call. Although there are exceptions, most, human female does are usually looking for much more thank physical prowess in a mate. As such as the case maybe, what follows are some general tips for capturing a doe's heart.

Approaching the Doe: Doe stalking is part science, but mostly art. Does are by nature very cautious and even skittish at times. You do not need guns, sticks, ropes, fancy traps or elaborate snares. Sugar and kindness are better weapons in this war of love. Approach slowly, gently and with confidence. Timing, location and persistence are also very important. If you come crashing through the forest, many of the does will scatter like the wind. You want to be noticed, but if you overplay the part, you will more likely be perceived as a boar (bore) rather than a strong and confident buck they would be proud to call their own.

Magic Bullets: Many doe hunters think that they have to shoot straight, hit hard and move fast to ensnare a doe. Guys search far and wide for the perfect pick-up lines, a.k.a. their magic bullets. Hello! Guys, even the best pick-up lines may work only once out of every 100 shots. What canned, pre-packaged and rehearsed pick-up lines do best is to mostly make you look ridiculous. The girls have already seen or heard most of them any way and it is usually just not the best way to get things started. ( See pick-up lines - The Good, Bad and the Ugly on this website).

Does and Clubs: It seems like a perfect analogy that bucks often view the club scene as their personal hunting grounds. Yet, singles bars and dance clubs are hardly the best locations for either serious or successful doe hunting. From the doe's perspective, a single's bar does feel a lot like a hunting preserve where they are the only game. The does may be scoping out the hunters themselves, but the nature of club environment tends to make than especially cautious because the know they are being aggressively hunted. Their duck, cover and run response is understandable considering all the "one-liner" bullets being fired at them. Inside the club, it's like a virtual hail on bullets that they have to dodge. It would be better to just go out for coffee or some other quiet, no fire zone.

Fertile Hunting Grounds: The best meeting places are usually not bars or dance clubs where everyone is either on the prowl, actively hunting, or ducking for cover. Better locations are often ordinary places like coffee shops, bookstores, Laundromats, supermarkets, sporting events, athletic activities or any normal, everyday place or location. Meeting in the company of mutual friends is very safe and more resistant to social errors and major faux paus that often accompany first encounters. In fact, the group encounter appears to be the most common and apparently preferred method that singles use to meet other singles. Human beings just seem to have a natural feeling of comfort and security in numbers. Consequently, group dating, although seldom identified as such, is a very common starting point for successful romantic encounters.

The Art of Subtlety: Female does tend to talk, think and act differently than male bucks; perhaps, they even see the world from a totally different perspective. Bucks, on the other hand, like to jump into the fracas immediately, accompanied by much stamping, snorting, bellowing and a show display of their antlers. Although a real deer might be swayed by such a grand display and a big rack of antlers, human females are generally more demanding and selective. In fact, figuring out the female's selection criteria is one of the foremost challenges confronting the male. This is why the subtle approach works best. First you must figure out just exactly what the female is looking for before you even begin to worry about trying to measure up to her standards.

First Impressions: Initially, the number one attractor for both sexes is how the other one looks. Although this may apply in general to both males and females, males seem to be particularly vulnerable to the attraction power of the beautiful female. Males will even go so far as to overlook the presence of other negative qualities as long as the female rates high on the "pretty scale". In contrast, females often require something more than a handsome face or a hunk bad in their chosen mates. As alien as this may seem to the male species, females tend to prefer verbal and auditory stimulation, and often gravitate to only those males who can talk intelligently and listen to them patiently. The right look might get their attention but only talking smart and listening well will keep the relationship alive and strong.

Looking Sharp: It would be virtually impossible to suggest a particular type or style of attire since fashion styles vary by region, time of year and individual tastes. However, being both well dressed and well groomed are extremely important factors in attracting and holding the attention of the opposite sex. In addition to dressing well, don't overlook the little things like nicely manicured and clean nails, a recent shave, fresh haircut, a pleasant but subtle scent, good shoes, and neatly fitting clothes. There is definitely an art to looking and dressing sharp and never be too afraid to ask for advice. It's not easy to see yourself as others see you and a second opinion can be invaluable.

The Art of Conversation: Good conversationalists often get plenty of dates no matter what they look like. Some people just see to be naturally good talkers. Have you ever noticed at a party or club how other people tend to gravitate towards those who initiate interesting conversations. However, capturing a heart is not about being the center of attention, in fact, just the opposite. You want her to be your center of attention. You should never make references to your other or previous relationships and don't stare at other woman. She will find your wanderlust to be rude and it may result in a quick end to a budding relationship.
Instead of using one-liners, just talk about something interesting that is going on in the world and the sooner you discover what interests her, the better for both of you. Try letting her lead the conversation, talk just a little and listen a lot and carefully to what she is saying. If she begins to think you are a legend in your own mind because all you do is talk about yourself, you will never become a legend in her mind. Listen, find out what she likes, and stay there throughout the entire conversation. She will definitely like being the center of attention and may ever love you for it someday.

Discover Her Passion: Everyone has a passion and it behooves you to discover hers as soon as possible. Her passion is most likely not her job and even less likely that it is sex. Once you have discovered her passions, you will at least be on the right road. Everyone loves to talk about what they like and they also tend to like people who really listen and demonstrate a genuine interest in what they enjoy doing most. The mistake that guys often make is in trying to steer the conversation towards the bedroom. Too quick a turn in this direction may sink your boat fast. It's much safer to just sail around in lazy conversational circles until you can reach homeport.

What Now: If you didn't say or do something incredibly stupid, by now you have engaged in a successful first contact. The initial romantic encounter is somewhat similar to flying in an airplane in a sense that the two most dangerous moments occur during take-off and landing. Establishing and maintaining a successful conversation during the first meeting is the take-off. Safely securing a second meeting is akin to the landing. When you are ready to bring up the subject of meeting again, try to avoid direct questions or anything that might indicate a long-term commitment. Suggesting another get-together with friends or in a group setting will put both of you at ease or if you are ready to strike out alone, suggest something fun in a public setting. If you have been paying attention, you should have already picked up some clues about what she would consider to be fun. This is no time to be clever or second-guess. You may think boxing or car racing is exciting, but if you bore her death right out of the gate, you may lose your chance forever. If you still have no clue about what to do on the second or third meeting, it's okay to do something routine, just don't make it too cheap. After three or four dates, hopefully by then you have discovered your mutual interests. If there are no mutual interests this romantic flight will never take-off. However, if you have discovered a common ground and you truly enjoy each others company; it is at this stage that the first buds of love may begin to bloom and that is the beginning a completely new and wonderful story.