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Girls Faultless Point System
Most Men do not realize that they are constantly
being tested and that all women have a flawless evaluation system that is foolproof;
albeit one that may be difficult for non females and nuclear physicists to understand
since the system defies all known laws of the universe. The system does however work
perfectly and is clearly understood by females worldwide. See for yourself how easy
it is for women to keep track of points on their men.
In the world of romance, one single rule applies:
Make the woman happy.
Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.
You don't get any points for doing something she expects.
Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system:
Simple Duties and Situations:
You make the bed...........+1
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows...0
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets............-1
You put the toilet seat down......0
You leave the toilet seat up...........-5
You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty.....0
When the toilet paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex...-1
When the Kleenex runs out you use the next bathroom...-2
You go out to buy her extra-light panty liners with wings..+5
In thesnow...........................................+8
But return with beer...............................-5
You check out a suspicious noise at night...........0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing.....0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something.....+5
You pummel it with a six iron..........................+10
It's her pet..............................................-10*
(*or a call from a lawyer depending on the perceived value of pet)
Social Engagements: Party:
You stay by her side the entire party...................0
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy...-2
Named Tiffany.......-4
Tiffany is a dancer....-6
Tiffany has implants...-80
Her Birthday:
You take her out to dinner..............0
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar......+1
Okay, it is a sports bar.......................-2
And it's all-you-can-eat night........-3
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night and
your face is painted the colors of your favorite team.......-10
A Night Out With the Boys:
Go with a pal.........................-5
The pal is happily married..........-4
Or frighteningly single............-7
And he drives a Mustang.......-10
With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED)......-15
A Night Out:
You take her to a movie.............+2
You take her to a movie she likes...+4
You take her to a movie you hate.....+6
You take her to a movie you like....-2
It's called DeathCop 3 or something similar.....-3
Which features cyborgs that eat humans.........-9
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans....-15
Your Physique:
You develop a noticeable potbelly................-15
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it....+10
You develop a noticeable potbelly and
resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts....-30
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one, too.".........-8000
The Big Question:
She asks, "Do I look fat?"........-1
(Yes, you lose points no matter what)
You hesitate in responding....-10
You reply, "Where?"............-35
Any other response.............-20
Communication: When she wants to talk about a problem:
You listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression......0
You listen, for over 30 minutes..........................+50
You listen for more than 30 minutes
without looking at the TV..........................+1000
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep........-2000
It's a tough test! How did you do?
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